Musings of the Muddled

Important Things I Have Learned in the Last Month

2011-06-14T16:53:00.001-05:00

1. Stop complaining about my boobs.

They haven’t tried to kill me yet. A friend of mine from church has been battling breast cancer. She is winning and doing it with humor and grace.

2. Get in photos with my kids.

A man at church lost his wife to leukemia. His four young kids lost their mother.

The day of the memorial I was in the shower thinking about what I was about to do and the woman we were honoring. I found myself thinking… oh, I hope they have some good photos of her for the memorial! Then I realized I was kicking myself. They whole time she was sick I was thinking of all of the things I could not do for Kelly and her family. I could not heal her, I could not make her well, I could not find a marrow donor for her, I could not make her body accept the donation, I could not could not could not. It makes you feel helpless, frustrated and small, all those can nots. I never really got to think of the things I could do because with all the could nots I just shut down and stopped thinking about it all together. (I hope as I mature and grow I will learn to push past that point of shutting down so I can be helpful. I imagine this is a characteristic those who are “good” in these kinds of situations possess or have learned through experience.)

The day of the memorial I realized something I could do but had not thought of. I could take photos of her, of her family together. I should have but I just did not think of it. The photos they had were wonderful, I am pretty sure that her smile could have shone through any old photo so no worries there but I wish I had thought to offer some family photos.

I realized something that day that sort of broke my heart. You see, her husband had put together this wonderful slide show of photos and videos of her. She was smiling with her kids and looking like an amazing, beautiful mom. She might not have thought her hair was just right, maybe she didn’t have mascara on, or maybe she just didn’t feel pretty those days, who knows. Maybe she just didn’t worry about those things because she knew better. I don’t know but I know she was in photos with her kids. I am rarely pictured in photos. I am either behind the camera so I am not in front of it or I am avoiding it because someone else has it. I would be almost invisible in a slide show of my family. If I died today my kids would have few photos to remember me by and this is a terrible fact.

My kids would not care about those things that make me uncomfortable. They love me as I am. So in honor of Kelly I am getting in photos with my family. I will no longer be visible only in the reflections of their eyes in the photos. I will be in front cheesing it up too, no mascara and all.

I did not think to offer family photos to Kelly’s family but if and when I have the opportunity to offer that to a family in this situation, I will.

Thank you Kelly.

Dirty Money; The Musical

2010-11-18T12:41:00.005-05:00

Please watch this a couple times so you can get the full effect. Note the Christmas pj bottoms, the chicken wing wiggle when he shakes his booty and the suggestion that we have a concert! Being three is awesome.

Such a boy. A fabulous, silly, ever entertaining boy.

Sorry for the bad joke at the end, it is my Sumner humor.

The Spot The Melts My Heart. Even When I Want to Destroy Him.

2010-11-16T10:42:00.001-05:00

We have been having our disagreements lately but we haven’t destroyed each other yet! See that little dimple on the right side of his smile? (your left) I love that little dimple. I hope that dimple never gets lost on his face or runs away. I might not see it much when he is a teenager so I might crawl in there and live in it for a while before then. Love. That. Dimple.

Throne Room!

2010-11-16T09:34:00.001-05:00

So I have a “fixer upper” to say the least. Our home maintains much of the “vintage” stylings of a typical 1960 ranch home. This includes but is not limited to faux vinyl brick pattern flooring and knotty yellow pine paneling. Fortunately for my house, budget and husband I can overlook some of it in order to do renovations in the appropriate way. While it would be lovely to gut everything and fix it all at once it would only be accomplished by financing it and we are not paying interest. We are smarter than that. Now.

When you first tour a house you are considering buying it is inevitable you will look around and make a list of things that will surely be the “first thing to go!”. In reality, this never ever happens unless it is some sort of health or safety concern.

Enter my toilet. Or rather my OLD toilet.

I will say that the people who lived here before us, well, they painted the toilet. Huh? I hear ya. I said it. Painted the toilet.

No no, not the outside of it. That might make some, if greatly limited, sense. No. Someone got the brilliant idea to paint the inside of the toilet BOWL.

Idiots. Total nutters.

I have been living with this toilet for much longer than I would like to admit but it was neither a health nor a safety concern so much to my chagrin it was pushed back on the priority list. Again and again. And again again.

This past weekend I found a wonderful brand new, never been pooped in, peed in, or had it’s bowl’s interior painted with latex paint to distract but not cover stains - toilet. I went to this estate sale (which was a-ma-zing) looking for tile for my bathroom they had advertised. I came away with a new, more contemporary, super water saver toilet! With a button. I know, it is the little things, like button flushers and non interior latex paint coated bowls. Best of all, it was only 50 dollars. Well, it was 65 but I negotiated a little off.

My Christmas present from last year was supposed to be a new toilet so I didn’t have to use hydrochloric acid to clean my can anymore. It didn’t quite happen because I just couldn’t justify it when we needed to drywall exposed studs or fix a car or whatever. Soooo! Merry Christmas to me!! I love my new potty!

It even has one of those silent closing lids. And did I mention, no latex paint!

I think the next thing might be to tackle ripping down the knotty pine paneling and brightening up the house. I do so love demolition!

My Princess, Her Frog

2010-11-02T05:23:00.000-05:00

Okay, toad. Hoppy. Hoppy the toad.

Oh Baby.

2010-11-01T16:39:00.001-05:00

I’ve Already Got Dat One!

2010-11-01T15:39:00.001-05:00

My sweet husband was such a fun Dad this weekend. He nicely encouraged me to do Halloween this year and was able to convince me it wasn’t worth my anxiety. I don’t know why but this weekend was kind of nerve wrecking for me. I think it has a lot to do with my perfectionist expectations and time deadlines. Despite me and my nerves we had a fun time. The kids got a nice amount of candy. Not too much, not too little. They looked cute, had fun and managed not to get freaked out by the big kids.

(Also, the big kids… Did anyone else notice an abundance of scantily clad young “ladies” this year? like 14 and 15! Eeeeek!! Alex and I kept looking at each other and thinking “over my dead body” type thoughts.)

We went trick or treating with a huge group of friends from church. Very fun. Great neighborhood.

Nate was very, very funny this year. He was very specific about what he did and did not want to get. If he already had one of what they were offering he would matter of factly tell them, “I already got dat.” and would make it obvious that the appropriate thing for them to do would be to lower their offerings and just let him choose one. Not 14, just one. One not already in his tool box. We wouldn’t want any repeats now would we? Funny kid! I started to explain trick or treat etiquette to him but really, it was very amusing.

Happy Saturday!

2010-10-23T09:15:00.001-05:00

I hope you are all out enjoying the fall weather, go find a festival or a pumpkin patch! This morning I am enjoying a few minutes of quiet. There is a goofy 80s movie on, I have a hot cup of tea, and 2/3 kids are with Daddy at the grocery store and the other is asleep so the house is quiet. Do you know what we are doing today? I don’t know either. We have no plans. It is great. So cheers! Happy fall!

Number Three

2010-10-20T09:22:00.002-05:00

I really can not believe this little man was born two months ago. I still feel like I should be debating the validity of my pregnant fears with my best friend via computer. “Nooo, you can’t be pregnant! Your boobs don’t hurt!” How many weeks did we do that while I peed on a stick urgently hoping it did NOT say pregnant?

Three was not in my plan. Three had never even really been something I had considered. It was always going to be two. I only have two arms after all. Three is completely out numbered. Last Thanksgiving I made Alex take me to the drugstore on the island we were staying on at the beach for yet another pregnancy test. It was the last one I was going to take. We were thankful for something else that day and I was wishing it wouldn’t be detrimental to have that glass of wine I had been planning on. This was crazy.

That was then. I am pretty sure gestation is nine months so you can get used to the idea of possessing and caring for a baby. The third was more shocking than the first in many ways.

Now that we have him I am completely in love and it just seems so obvious that he should be here. How could we not have known that he was missing from our family? He is the perfect fit!

My Grandmother Joanne sent me this card after he was born and it explains perfectly…

One of the sweetest things about welcoming a new baby boy is learning how you fit together.. The way his sleepy weight fills your arms so perfectly and how that place where neck and shoulder meet suddenly seems made for him to snuggle his head into. But even more than that, it’s discovering just how beautifully he fits into your life – how there was always a place right in the heart of your family just waiting for this precious boy to come and fill it with so much love.

Pretty good for a card huh? Thanks Hallmark.

We just didn’t know yet that he was missing and now that he is here I can’t figure out how it ever could worked without Eli in our lives.

Tickly Blankin

2010-10-13T15:13:00.001-05:00

I was doing Eli’s laundry today so his main blanket was in the washing machine. Nate’s freshly washed blue “tickly blankin” was lying there and he was in no way concerned with it so I grabbed it and covered Eli up with it.

Do you see where this is going? Mind you, I have often found Eli tucked in with this same blanket on Nate’s own accord in times where he was seeking to comfort his sweet little baby brother.

I came in to check on him a little while later and found that the blanket had been removed. In its place tucked sweetly across Eli in the swing I found something else blue, Daddy’s boxer briefs from the sorted dirty laundry pile. Yes, my son tucked his little brother in with his daddy’s dirty draws.

A warning? I think so. hehe

New Mommy Fail Anxiety!

2010-10-06T09:34:00.003-05:00

I have discovered a whole new potential Mommy FAIL situation to be anxious about. I'm doing futbol (soccer) games by myself on all days other than Saturdays. I am now panicked that one of three things will occur due to my honest lack of those darn eyes in the back of my head I was promised.

A. Nate will be abducted or or bounced off the bumper of one of the mommy mobiles in the parking lot which is so temptingly near all that sand to play and dig in while I obsessively take photos of Ella playing futbol.

B. Ella will score her first amazing life changing GOOOOOOOOOAL while I have my head turned making sure Nate is not being abducted or hit by a car.

C. Eli’s hat will fall off during A. or B. causing him to freeze to death or his ears to chip off as a result of that wicked wind blowing across the open field all while lying in my lap.

All Mommy FAILS.

Where are these eyes for the back of my head????!!

Did I mention my camera is BROKEN?!!!!!!

Forge(d)

2010-09-30T13:05:00.001-05:00

I have had this word in my head lately.

Forge: Verb

to form by heating and hammering
to move forward slowly and steadily
to move with a sudden increase of speed and power

In my case I have been feeling like I have been being hammered incessantly for about 2 years now. Maybe longer, but it all blurs together doesn’t it? I have been heated to the point of submission, beaten into shape, heated, reevaluated, beaten some more, thrown into the fire and beaten again. Am I taking shape? Not sure really but it is the visual I have had for about a week or so.

I am under the impression that metal is treated in this way in order to turn it from something useless into something that is stronger and with purpose. Can you relate? Really in the scheme of things what I have been through is nothing really. Nothing traumatic, nothing life or death, nothing of great consequence to most of the world. However, I am spoiled. So it is shaping me.

So I would say I am still in definition 1. right now.

I do think that I may be moving into definition 2. to move forward slowly and steadily. I don’t feel as though I am stuck now. I have pushed through something and am steadily gaining some momentum.

By I, I really mean we. My husband and I. Nice to be able to say that. We. We are working together. We are pushing through. We are gaining momentum. I am especially grateful for this. It is the reason I am gaining and not stagnating, his partnership.

I haven’t gained so much that I qualify for definition 3. yet but that gives me hope. “To move with a sudden increase of speed and power”. Read that again. That sounds great doesn’t it? It gives me hope. I am being shaped and painful as it sometimes seems, stubborn as I sometimes am to accept molding, I am taking shape. I don’t know what my purpose will be, not a clue what I am being molded into but I have faith that it is something better than what I am now.

Better Things to Do...?

2010-09-29T19:52:00.003-05:00

Yea, I am pretty sure he qualifies as something better to do. Or at least something cuter to look at right? For all my friends who are out of town, grandparents far away or anyone else. I uploaded video just for you. Feel loved. I give you, Eli: Smiling Baby. Cheers!

Something to Chew On

2010-07-14T16:15:00.001-05:00

You can have everything, just not at the same time.

Have I said that before? That is one of the best things I have heard as an adult and especially since I have become a mother. We try to accomplish enough to satisfy all of our drives, try to be everything we aspire to be, try to divide ourselves into enough pieces for everyone who wants us.

What happens when you make everything a priority, nothing is and nothing gets the attention it truly deserves.

You can have everything. You just have to chose what you have now and what, or who, waits for another time in life. Unfortunately there just isn’t enough room sometimes. Learning what is important now is part of growing up. So is saying NO.

(Thank you Rod for that little bit of knowledge, as annoying as it is to be reminded sometimes.)

Just for Me – Boring I Am Pregnant Stuff

2010-07-14T06:44:00.001-05:00

I have had a few people ask me why I haven’t done regular posts since November or so. I guess I realized I had been doing the blog more for other people than for myself and really, who wants to read that? From me anyways.

I ran out of space in my brain for all of that.

My last post was regarding my “little bean”. We are still calling him or her “little bean” but we do have a couple names sort of picked out. We never do seem to pull off names before the baby is two days old or they are kicking us out of the hospital all together. It has been fun messing with people’s heads on names too. Always a joy to indulge our evil sides and watch people’s faces distort in horror when you suggest “Hannibal” as a serious contender for a boy name.

I have three weeks left and really, I am excited. I am terrified and excited. It is good that gestation takes nine months because if it were any shorter I would have been much more panicked. I am not sure when I switched over from feeling like this little surprise was ridiculously surprising, kind of like how I would have felt had Alex and I gotten pregnant before we were married to a feeling of being given another chance but it happened somewhere along the way there.

I have been trying to appreciate certain aspects of pregnancy this time. I need to take some photos of myself as I have absolutely none of my previous two pregnancies, something I regretted afterward. One nice thing about this pregnancy, so far, no new stretch marks! After the third I guess I am all stretched out so my belly doesn’t look like Freddy Kruger got a hold of it.

My kids have been so sweet with the baby too. Nate humors me and I am sure thinks I am crazy when I tell him to feel the baby move. Alex has been able to feel this little kicker since 19 weeks old. Nate on the other hand, he thinks I am nuts and just makes his hand jump and goes “oh, I feel one Mommy!” to humor me so I will give him his hand back. Sweet huh? The baby just will not kick fast enough for his three year old attention span. Maybe in the next 3 weeks. He sings to the baby and kisses on it and pokes it and jumps on it though. This is going to be a tough baby, I can tell. Ella is wonderful and so funny. She is quite insistent that this baby is a girl. She insists it is a girl because she prayed for a girl. Umm…. We may have a challenge to our faith on our hands come delivery day. I have tried to explain but she has it in her head that she will get what she prayed for and that a little sister is sure to be much less annoying than a little brother. I tried to explain that second part also, she isn’t convinced. That is okay, a friend at church had the same issue and she gave me a great angle so I am good to go if there is a wee wee.

Alex is sweeter with this baby belly than the other two as well. It really is wonderful to see him bond with the lump in my abdomen that really is quite freakish sometimes, sorry little bean, you are. He is convinced it is a boy.

It is fun not knowing.

We had another ultrasound, my latest ever in a pregnancy. The midwife wanted to make sure I wasn’t giving birth to King Kong. I am not, a nice perfect 49th% baby. As a special treat to us and I am sure directly related to the fact that BOTH of my kids were sitting quietly and being sweet, the ultrasound technician turned on the 3D. My heart almost fell out of my chest when I saw my baby’s squishy little face. HOW INSANE IS THAT! Facial features. Inside. Through all my fat!! It was crazy. I was so thankful. What an amazing experience.

There is his or her squishy face and an arm. Poochy lips. So yum.

I also hope this will be an opportunity to share this with my Mother. She hasn’t been able to make it to the other two deliveries. She was just outside the hospital with one and just outside the city with the other. I have to give her enough time to not necessitate time travel to see her grandbaby born this time.

In the meantime Alex and I have turned over some new leaves. We have some big goals, new challenges and exciting things to look forward to. We are busy with guinea fowl, vegetable gardens, home renovations, six year olds, three year olds, Dave Ramsey, marriage, and that seems to be enough to keep us busy for the moment.

I would love to blog again regularly but we will see where that fits in later. In the meantime man this blog needs a makeover. Do not have time for that. I am busy nesting in other places, I think my online space will have to wait.

Cheers! See you soon-ish.

I Have a Bean

2010-01-13T21:07:00.001-05:00

I have a bean. Not as catchy as I have a dream but it works. I have a bean in my tummy. “Little Bean” is about 11 weeks old and the size of a lime. Little Bean no longer has webbed feet and hands but would still scare the crap out of the kids if they saw her. Yes, they insist the baby is indeed a her. No ifs, ands or penises.

The kids have been very sweet and excited about the new baby. They have no concept of time so of course they keep wondering WHEN WHEN WHEN is the baby coooooming?? Ella has been great. She was rubbing my back yesterday when I was heaving while I tried to insist I was really fine and she could go back to watching Diego. She didn’t buy it and stayed with me for a minute before telling me nicely that MAN my face was red. Nate has been a sweetheart too. He is very funny about the whole thing and more likely to accept that I will give birth to a kangaroo than a boy. We shall see. If I had to bet right now I would agree with them both based on my body’s reaction to the hormones.

Anyways, I have recovered from the shock of in fact BEING pregnant now for the most part. I am still adjusting to the never even remotely considered idea of being a mother to three. Alex seems like he has also recovered from the shock. He was great. Three may not seem like as many to him as me. I just don’t have three arms so it seems strange. Go figure.

So that is a good excuse for not blogging right? Right? Yea, I think it is. So that will be me. Mom of a six, three and 0 year old. Little ducklings all lined in a row. Quack baby. I’ll be quackers!

Oh Where, Oh Where…

2009-11-21T08:52:00.001-05:00

Has Aprille gone?

It has been four thousand weeks since my last post! Long are the days and short is the motivation, or need I guess. See I blog because it is better than talking to myself I think. I am a person who needs to hash things out. I talk to myself, I fight with myself, and I act out things in my head. It is cathartic. This blog turned into something I could use to hash things out. Lately I guess life had just been quieter. It is a quiet season full of crunchy leaves and seasonal coffee creamer.

It is about to be less quiet for me. I love Christmas but last Christmas was less than stellar for me. It had a great outcome but now things that used to sing to me of joy are sort of tainted by last year’s circumstances. Now decorating the tree stings of things I just don’t want associated with Christmas. So this year I will be replacing those memories with new fresh ones smelling of cinnamon and orange peels, apple cider, crisp winter air, and burning pine branches.

I will be changing the way I do Christmas this year in order to create new memories. Sometimes you have to be proactive. I am fortunate that I get along well with my family so Christmas with them is always lovely. My mom does Christmas well. My whole immediate family embraces the real spirit of Christmas and the day is full of small thoughtful gifts and a true sense of love, celebration of the gift we really celebrate and family.

This year I think we will be doing Christmas morning at home in our house, my two babies, the love of my life and the dog we call crack head. We have never spent a Christmas morning at home and I think it will be nice. I think I need that this year, snuggling with my babies. I haven’t spent a Christmas away from my Mom in a long time, not since splitting holidays with my father as a teen.

I don’t think she will mind. She is a good Mommy.

I need to think of some fun things to do with the kids and Daddy this year around Christmas. I think I need some new fun things.

So what are you doing this year? Do you have any traditions that you keep? Do you spend the holidays with your family? Do you volunteer? Do you watch a 24 hour marathon of A Christmas Carol? Tell me what you do and give me ideas for something to do to re-set the mood this year.

(This is an opportunity for me to see just how many readers have completely given up on me EVER doing a blog post again and don’t even notice a new one!) Sigh. You know you love me anyways.

Boys.

2009-11-16T22:33:00.001-05:00

In the car today nate was singing a little song that I think maybe they were singing in class singing "I’m making soup, I’m making soup" and making pot stirring motions.

I was all awww that’s so cute! I wonder what song he’s singing. Maybe they pretended they were making soup in his preschool class today.

Then a minute later after he discovered we were paying attention to him the song changed into "I’m making poop, I’m making pooooop!!"

Boys.

Meet My Buddy….

2009-10-28T19:15:00.001-05:00

…Grumpy McGrumperson

Dislikes: Smiling in photos, getting out of bed, empty countertops where bananas should be, throwing leaves in the air, blowing his nose, and Mommy’s affinity for her camera.

Likes: Soggy shoes, smelly pumpkin guts, stealing his sister’s milk, applying mascara to his toe nails, waking his sister up, growling, breaking crayons and snuggles with mommy after a good cathartic grumpy episode.

“Humph! I NO Grumperson!”

A Crisp Fall Indeed

2009-10-22T12:22:00.005-05:00

I am missing the leaves in the mountains this fall. I can feel them changing without me. My sister Lindsey loves this quote and I have to say, I am inclined to agree.

Life starts all over again when it gets crisp in the fall. - F. Scott Fitzgerald

(Over) Exposed on the Beach

2009-10-15T12:42:00.001-05:00

I have been experimenting a lot with my photography lately. Some of it has been a complete fail but good experience. I have decided I need a graduated filter for some of the stuff I like to shoot and some of it I need Photoshop so I can merge several exposures into one photo using HDR so that is productive right?

That one is straight out of the camera. It was that pretty. The 50mm lens isn’t nearly wide enough of an angle though. I still love it but I will be renting a 10-22mm lens for a beach project I have over the Thanksgiving weekend.

We took off for the beach for the day last Saturday. I love when Alex is all "wanna go to the b.e.a.c.h.?" We spell a lot you know, to mess with the kid's heads. And so Alex can learn how to spell in English since it is his second language. And so I can learn how to spell in English, since I can't spell to save my life and I am supposed to teach my kid how to read now. Someday when Ella can read I will go through all my blog posts and edit all the sentences that start with “And” because that is a no no, right along side interchanging there, they’re and their. You know, so she can’t accuse me of bad grammar.

Random Aside: It is incredibly annoying trying to teach a five year old how to sound out words when there are about 9 million sounds an A can possibly make in the English language.

So we went to the beach. I did not have hurricane force winds this time so I got to take some photos! Woo hoo! Most of them are overexposed but I like it. It is where I am. I wanted to see their (correct usage of their) eyes so overexposed in that sunlight was the way to go. Nice hair. I see your mother doesn’t want to cut your hair. As usual.

Okay so I like the exposure on this one pretty well but you see her arm on the right? See that blue line tracing her arm? WHY?That is Nate focused on getting away from that wave quickly. This one is cute. I took him home with me.

Daddy always builds a big pool for the kids when we go to the beach. He is awesome. Nate prefers his dugout pool to the waves anytime.Ella loves the waves now and has a ball with it. Sand in every single place possible. I didn’t post the ones of her picking her sand wedgie.

She kind of reminds me of Ophelia in this one - except less dead and more relaxing in the sun.

Have a nice day!

October

2009-10-01T09:22:00.001-05:00

Fall is on the way. Cool air has moved in, the spiders are spinning, the leaves are changing and I am a happy girl. Here is a little reminder of the miracles you can find around you every day if you just keep your eyes open. Have your camera handy, stop to appreciate it and then take a photo or twelve.

Some Wildflowers

2009-09-11T12:00:00.005-05:00

I thought some flowers might be in order today, the eighth anniversary of Nine Eleven.

When I was photographing this butterfly I first thought oh sad, he is all torn up. It won't look so good in the photos. Then I thought wow, he is all torn up. He is a fighter! I wonder what kinds of things have tried to tear him apart, eat him, pluck him piece by piece. So often I feel like that and at face value, we just feel less ourselves, less valued because of our scars and the things eating us piece by piece. I used to feel like those little pieces being taken from me would be the end of me. I would just slowly get plucked away small piece by small piece. Not anymore.

The more I know God and find that real relationship, the less I feel that.

I think this butterfly's scars and wounds make it all the more amazing to behold. It is still movin along. Still beautiful.

Wedding One

2009-09-02T15:20:00.004-05:00

You guys! I helped shoot a wedding!

Melanie (my cousin) of Rethink Real Photography asked me to help shoot a wedding last weekend and miracle of miracles it worked out where I could soo... Here are some from the day!

I was asked to focus on the groom, groomsmen and some details. I could post more but these are some favorite from the day. The groom, okay all the males were GREAT! The groom was confidant, fun, relaxed and knew he looked good. He was so fun to shoot!

This guy, him I did not pose once. 100% naturally smooth.

So. much. fun.

Dear Nate...

2009-08-27T11:52:00.007-05:00

Dear Nate,
Stop with the fit throwing. You will not win. Ask your sister.

With love,
Mommy - aka THE ENFORCER

I ♥ Vintage

2009-08-25T11:29:00.005-05:00

This dress... oh this dress. It makes me so happy.

That is my daughter two weeks ago on her first day of Kindergarten. She had a fabulous time that day and she was wearing the dress I wore on my first day of kindergarten right after we moved to the Netherlands in 1985. Over the years my mom saved some key pieces from my childhood for me but I thought she had given them all to me when my daughter was a baby! Mother's day this year she pulled out this sweet little number for Ella to wear (if she wanted to) on her first day. (She still has some tricks up her sleeve!) Ella's approval was immediately solidified when she discovered - it spins! It fit like a glove.

This dress brings back a flood of emotion and memories. I remember waking up in the sunny little pension before we had even moved into a house overseas, walking downstairs to a truly amazing continental breakfast - European style in my beautiful dress and seeing my sweet little teacher's smiling face the first day of school. It makes me think of my beautiful mother packing these treasures away carefully and hauling them around over oceans and within houses not nearly big enough to find storage for these, not really. It also makes me think of my own sweet girl spinning in the front yard no longer a tiny little thing curled into my arm.

I love her new funky shoes, not matching the dress but her own personal touch on the outfit. She felt confidant and ready to conquer the world that morning in that dress and those shoes. Great day, great dress, great memories!

Here are some more shots from the day... Today You Became Old. An Old Old Kindergartener.
Also can I get a high five for all of these photos being straight out of the camera with no editing!

for more nostalgia head over to the amazing I ♥ Faces site!! You want to.

A Classic

2009-08-23T14:44:00.001-05:00

I am a car girl. Some girls really could not care less about a car but me, I am not one of them. Cars make me happy, cars make me oooohh, cars can even make me swoon. I sometimes wish I were not a car swooner because sometimes my mommy mobile, she just doesn’t do it for me. I love her and she is faithful but she doesn’t really make me swoon.

Yesterday we happened to be driving around Burlington, NC and off the highway in a parking lot we saw a small classic car show. Nothing huge, just some very cool cars in a parking lot showing off. We decided we needed to have a closer look and luckily for you I had my camera! I was just working on capturing some of the smaller details of the cars, working my camera to get better angles and keeping my kids OFF of the fancy cars because apparently, they are car people too.

Doesn’t it look like Ella & Nate are consulting over what is wrong with the car? hehe (Ella, your tag is hanging out.)(Alex, wipe the drool off the front bumper)

I don’t know what they are, so don’t ask. Alex could tell you. I could tell you there were some more there I liked better but there were too many people around to get good shots.

This baby is 80 years old and still running! I only hope I am so lucky!

So do cars do it for you? Are you a shoes girl or maybe handbags? What gets your engine going? It is cleaning isn’t it? I knew it.

Washing Away the Blah

2009-08-21T11:14:00.001-05:00

Yesterday I was having one of those blah days. You know those days when you just don’t feel quite right? Nothing traumatic had happened, Nate was being good and Ella was off to school fine but I was blah. You saw the whiney post, you know. No, I had not had coffee and that might have been part of the missing equation but it was not purely to blame. It was just one of those days.

Lately I have been missing rain. Rain and I had been close friends at end of spring and the beginning of the summer. Recently rain has been going “Oh crap it’s Aprille, I’ll just pretend I didn’t see her” and left me standing there going did the rain just see me and turn around?? So insulting. I mean, it would rain everywhere except my house. Literally, not me being dramatic. Death Valley was getting rain and there I was doing a rain dance in my yard and praying for my jalapeno plants. See, not dramatically over exaggerated at all.

As I was driving to pick up Ella from school this wonderfully grey stormy sky moved overhead. It was one of those storms I had not seen coming and let me tell you I was so relieved to see those thunderclouds. I have seen that recently though. The only water that fell were my completely insulted and rejected tears.

It poured. It was fantastic. I had my windows down so I could feel the coolish rain on my hands. The drops were so big they stung when they hit my arm. The rain was beading up on my windshield and making those beautiful streaks in the wind. It stopped so all the kids could get into their cars and get home though. That was 10 minutes worth but it was nice. That was my short stint of rain and if I was lucky it might have rained the 15 miles away at my house. I took the kids home and got them in the bed for naps and settled in for a minute myself. I was chatting it up with my friend when I saw it again. It got dark in my living room.

At 4:54 in the afternoon the following conversation took place:

it is POURING outside

which is great

RAIN

i want to go dance in it

its been so dry

ill be back

i think i am going to!

well, maybe not dance

Then I went outside. It was fantastic. I just stood there. In the rain. The pouring rain. I looked up and let it soak my face and saturate my hair and I laughed at myself. It didn’t take long before I was completely dripping with cool fresh rain. The air was heavy and humid but there was a cool breeze coming through the trees. I just stood there and let the rain wash away my blah. Then I smiled and prayed. I don’t know what I prayed. It was one of those completely in the moment prayers, those are the good ones. I needed that connection yesterday.

I need nature to feel closer to God. You see, we don’t make rain. As much as we try we can not control the weather. Things like that remind me that I am a very small piece of a larger picture. I see God in the rain, sunrises and sunsets, mountains and even the natural disasters. God washed the crap and weight off me in those few short minutes outside in the rain yesterday and I felt it immediately.

Do I often go outside and just stand in the rain? No. I have danced in the rain one time, run in it really. I was younger and in that happy place with little real responsibility where I often did fun silly things like that. I have been caught in the rain on many occasions and decided to enjoy it but that is different.

Choosing to go out in the rain, to get all wet, to let your makeup smear and your clothes get soaked and squishy is different. You have to choose spontaneity sometimes. I didn’t choose to go outside so I could have a moment to connect with God I just went be like a kid for a minute and just be. What ended up happening was not what I expected but totally what I needed. If I had not given into that childlike, irresponsible impulse that moment I would have missed that blessing. The rain did not last. It lasted long enough to completely soak me then it moved on. It was long enough to have that moment of connection.

I am so glad I didn’t miss it. Keep your heart open to those moments.

Bringing Bacon.

2009-08-20T08:00:00.001-05:00

So Alex told me last night he should be changing departments at his second job starting next week. This is the one that will move him to the hours of 7:00am – 9:00pm Monday through Friday, off on weekends and holidays (which I will believe when I see). In my head every reference to this switch is spoken in a deep foreboding voice, like one off the movie previews. In my head it isn’t something to celebrate, my husband gone for such long hours every day. Have I even told you about this yet? I feel like it has been playing over and over in my head for months but I guess I haven’t gotten it out here yet.

Anyways, Alex came to tell me last night that this transition would be happening soon. He has been working two jobs for about a year now. His schedule changes from week to week and we never know when he will be working or not so it is hard to plan. It is also hard because we can not plan on the money either. He will be getting a pay increase and stable hours with the other department and it will also be a job doing what he enjoys, fixing things. All good things right?

My thing, the reason that dark voice has been playing in my mind is that he will not see the kids Mon – Friday now. He has to be at work 1/2 hour away at 7:00am. Ella is in Kindergarten now so the days of waiting up to see Daddy are long gone. Apparently kids need sleep so they are to bed at 8:30 at the latest. So that means no jumping on Daddy, wrestling, giggling, tickling, all that fun stuff to get them all riled up. They will miss him but he will miss them too. I notice a difference in him when the kids and he haven’t seen each other.

I am not looking forward to this.

That was why it was funny to me, when he told me last night, that he used the excited happy voice not the deep foreboding impending doom voice of a low budget end of the world movie voice over. He is happy about the change.

This is good. I am glad he is happy, I know it is because he will feel like he is accomplishing more, his self worth goes up, he feels he is providing and doing that man thing. Bringing home bacon baby.

I am also glad because I have been able to put on a strong front and am supporting him which is important. I can whine on here, it is my outlet and he doesn't read it. He does not know that I have been dreading this. The truth is this will be hard on all four of us, well five, the dog will miss him too (he is the fun one). While I know I would rather have him home than all the money in the world I know I need to support him so he doesn’t feel like crap about doing what he thinks is the right thing to do.

Also, both our Love Languages are “Quality Time”. Hum. This might get interesting.

I know none of this is anything to whine about. I know we are blessed that not only does he have one job, but two. I know I get to sleep next to him and hold him at night and the kids can assault him and beat on him all weekend and call him on the phone during the week. I know all these things and they do make me happy. I just needed to vent a little. Also, say a little prayer for Alex and the kids (and the dog). Like I said, I am not the fun one.

I am so thankful for those of you who indulge me by visiting here. You do make me feel less crazy and less solitary. For those of you who know me in real life, have patience with me. It is hard for me to be social sometimes. I am a work in progress.

Mexican. Real Mexican.

2009-08-12T14:21:00.002-05:00

Last week my husband and I were visiting with our aunt Julieta – we call her “Tortilla” instead of Tia. Tia is Spanish for “Aunt” but Ella decided when she was little that “Tortilla” was much more fitting so it stuck. That kid is smart because Tortilla is one amazing cook. I have never tasted food like she cooks. All amazing authentic Mexican food, seafood stews, simple delicious salsas, long intricate recipes to die for and just generally delicious food. I also love her. She is wonderful all around.

We were sitting around the table attempting to talk about stuff like our gardens through our language barrier and food came up which is often the case. She asked if I had made any molcajete (mol-ca-he-tāy) salsas with the tomatoes and jalapenos from the garden and I replied that I don’t have a molcajete yet but it is on my must buy list when I finally get to Mexico. (There is a lot on this list by the way) She was surprised to hear I did not yet have one and sent the husband digging into the back of a cabinet and low and behold the sun broke through the clouds, shone through the window and right onto that very spot… then the angels began to sing… in Spanish.

It was my very own Molcajete. Mine. All. Mine!

This basalt mortar and pestle is perfect for grinding spices or making and serving salsas. I am very excited. Want to hear the funny part? It made me feel a little more like a real Mexican. I joke all the time about me, the only non Mexican in this gigantic family, being Mexican now, ex: when I eat spicy spicy food and don’t cry I say its because I am Mexican now. This gift made me feel a little more authentic and I like that.

I worry about the kids not fitting in sometimes with that side of the family. Alex does not speak Spanish at home (don’t nag me about that or I will bite you) and I want them to appreciate and take pride in their heritage and culture. What makes me feel like I am slightly less of a failure in this area is when they are totally able to eat like little tiny Mexicans. Enter the tortilla…

The tortilla (corn tortilla) is not only a food staple in our house, it is an eating utensil. It is fork, it is spoon, it is vital and convenient. It is paired with many meals in our house and the kids are well schooled in it’s use. This makes me feel good, a small but integral thing. They can’t speak Spanish but they can eat with a tortilla!

I know, it sounds pathetic to me too. Oh well. At least I have my Molcajete to fall back on.

Isn’t she pretty?

I Miss Ella

2009-08-11T10:57:00.002-05:00

I miss Ella. Those are the three words Nate said as we left Ella in Kindergarten for the very first day today.

Yesterday was just a meet and greet type thing. Today was the big kahuna, the giant enchilada, the full monty, the day she finally got to take that Tinkerbell lunchbox! 8:00am - 2:45pm. Today she was also completely oblivious to my presence once we opened those school doors. She really is good to go. She knew where her class was, went and put away her backpack, sat down at her desk and got to work on a puzzle waiting for her. I might get in trouble for picking having the gall, the nerve to pick her up today, we shall see. I did manage to get a little squeeze from her before I left but I was happy she was oblivious, she is confidant and ready to grow.

Then I walked out the door with my sons small two year old hand in mine. I got misty and was very thankful for that little hand in mine. At least he still loves me!!! Just kidding. I was very thankful for Nate as a distraction, I think otherwise I would have cried. I was just so excited for her, she looked so purposeful, intent on absorbing and having fun and making friends. She looked very contented.

As I drove away from school I prayed for her, her teachers, the new friends she would make and the staff. I teared up again as I prayed for my girl and asked for God to watch over her and help her grow.

Nate and I went to the park and had some fun. Want to see what we did? Okay.

We went to go see Josephine.. she is our favorite mule.

Nate told daddy that Mommy was okay. He called to check.

We did some airplane spotting.

Some toad catching….

and more toad catching. This might need to be a normal occurrence.

I miss Ella too little dude but I sure am glad we get to play, just you and me. Until 2:30, then we get to assault Ella with hugs and hear all about how awesome her day was!

Today You Became Old. An Old Old Kindergartner.

2009-08-10T13:35:00.017-05:00

Today Ella, you became old. You boldly went out into the world, struck a pose and said bring it on! You confidently marched into your Kindergarten class, introduced yourself to your teachers with an inquisitive smile, had no problems playing with the guys in class and just in general made me proud. You carried yourself with your head held high and made me remember how much fun it was to be five and on your way to being "Big". I had fun today too!

Today was one large step toward you being an adult, functioning in society knowing who you are and making decisions based upon a foundation your family helped build but blazing your own path all the way. I was proud of not only you, but the people who love you who helped to shape you into such a confidant sweet young woman. You are a young woman, I saw it today. You are a very young woman but I see her inside you already. I know soon enough I will be looking you over in a cap and gown and thinking back on today talking about how it seemed just yesterday I was dropping you off for Kindergarten. I can not wait to see more, and at the same time I can wait. I will enjoy hugging you tight tonight. I am overjoyed you are so empowered but it is a little hard for a mommy's heart to see this sight....

You see, it really does seem like not so long ago you and I were beginning our bond with each other. Today I felt so proud to call you mine. You rock Gabriella. No really, you do. I am so very thankful God gave you to us, you truly are my favorite girl in the whole world!

You and I had another special bond today didn't we? You really were so cute in that dress, even the big girls thought so. The 11th graders were complementing your style today. You were sporting the Vintage Mommy again today. Gran saved that dress, unbeknown to me, the dress I wore to my first day of Kindergarten. You were also so cool in your new shoes. I was going to have you wear shoes that... you know, matched your outfit, but I thought what the heck. Matching is for people with no sense of personal style right? You loved the dress and you loved the shoes so I loved the combination.

I remember staring around in wonder at my new classroom's surroundings when I started kindergarten with that same look you had today. I am so glad you are excited sweetie. I am too! Daddy, however, is a little dumbfounded I think. By the way I saw him eying some of your classmates, specifically all the boys that were there but I will keep an eye on him so he doesn't pull any weird "Major Payne" type dad stuff. He worries that you fit in so well with them even with the dresses and "Hello Kitty". I expect tomorrow one specific boy will be thinking of you a lot. Nate will be more than a little lost with no Ella but don't worry, I will not let him in your room while you are gone. This is his time to become as confidant and self reliant as you proved to be today.

(Third boy from the left is the small brother very much wishing he was 5 already)

Ella may I just make one request of you when you go back tomorrow and pretty much every school day until the end of time.... when it comes time to share with the class do not mention things like this. I don't think I have bestowed the gift of subtlety on you yet.

You just love a dress that twirls (so do I!)

Well done, Ella! Well done!
Here is to another 12 years of waking up way earlier than you want sweetie!

(p.s. we need to discuss this whole sleeping in when your supposed to go to school and waking at the butt crack of dawn when you can actually sleep in thing okay?)

Day 4 and I Am In Love

2009-08-07T09:13:00.003-05:00

Just a note... the kids haven't seen Daddy in 4 days now due to scheduling conflicts. It hasn't been too bad. We ar e in the thick of potty training and Nate is a rock star let me tell you. I hadn't planned on potty training this summer but he just went one day so it is on! Nate has also been spending a lot of time in the corner for his new favorite pass time, chucking things at his sister. Yes, at least once a day I hear the repercussions of some object teaching Ella about the laws of Physics. We literally learn things the hard way around here. Get it? Learning physics the hard way.. getting hit? Okay I am done.

Nate and Ella are proof you can not think one form of discipline works for all kids. What was needed to work for Ella totally kills Nate's spirit and is completely inappropriate for him. He does give the sweetest apologies when he comes out of the corner though. He is such a different kid than Ella. She, of course, is just like me. The girl doesn't give an inch with her parents.

In photography news I got a new lens. I bought the oh so popular Canon 50mm 1.8 from a local camera shop and yes, I am in love. I have been longing to see the beautiful tones of browns, honeys and greens in my kid's eyes to no avail for years, only black. Not anymore!

See - eyes! These are right out of the camera with no editing at all. They would look better if I edited them but I am not worried about that right now. Look at the pretty bokeh too!! Pretty bokeh and eyes that look the color they are! Happy happy Mommy.

Also Ella starts Kindergarten on Monday. MONDAY!

Computer Free Productivity & Bedroom Bliss

2009-07-31T10:50:00.007-05:00

haha. That rhymes.

Yesterday I had a self imposed computer free day of cleaning. My bedroom looks SO MUCH BETTER.

I think my bedroom needs a makeover. When Alex and I got married I looked long and hard for a bedroom comforter set that was both masculine and pretty. I ended up with one I liked that I spent probably too much money for but it has a very limiting color scheme. The end result was something less than lovely and romantic. I mean, it is nice and I like it but it isn't something I would pick for me.

I have since discovered something in my eight years of marriage..... ALEX DOES NOT CARE! I need not be so concerned with his personal sense of style because like a good husband (in this area), if I am happy, he is happy! I am in no way a girly girl so I wouldn't decorate with pink and roses and bows. Not my style. That is pretty much all he would abhor, pink girly bows. I love that in the house, I can decorate any way I see fit and he genuinely likes it.

This puts me in the clear to decorate my bedroom however I really please because the reality of the whole thing is Alex will only notice the bedroom ambiance if there is a bad smell or I am standing in the middle of it naked. Otherwise, he has a pillow, he is good!

So wooo hooo!! I think I need a new look! Picasso's Nude above will stay in the room and I am thinking minimalism. I am thinking a simple yet dramatic floral accent. I am thinking blues. I will be playing around with http://www.bhg.com/decorating/ for some inspiration on colors. That is a fun place to play by the way... Also checking here for textiles.... IKEA.

Inspiration in the bedroom.... now I think that is something Alex will also be willing to get into!

What about you? Is the bedroom less than inspirational at this point? Got the kid's rooms all done but totally neglected your retreat? Does your retreat make you want to turn off the lights so you can have a little romance or turn them off so you don't see the diapers and the boring white walls?

I ♥ Faces - Beach!

2009-07-28T14:57:00.006-05:00

Go here to see some serious beachy goodness: I ♥ Faces!

Chef Ella

2009-07-27T18:43:00.001-05:00

Ella’s recipe for yummy pizzas: 5 year old wit & charm - raw and served up a plenty.

(above is her “I’m explaining something serious” look. Cocked head slightly to the side, no eye contact as if it would distract her from the task at hand. She makes me laugh.

Mommy’s recipe for yummy pictures she can post without editing at all because she really isn’t worried about pizza pictures inside her dark kitchen in the evening with a fluorescent light that sometimes doesn’t want to work and pictures that blur out all the crap cluttering the counter tops so I don’t look like SUCH a slacker on my own blog: My new 50mm 1.8 lens. Even without doing a thing to these and just having gotten it today, I can still see Ella’s brown irises. Happy Mommy.

NATE JUST PEED! On the Potty,

2009-07-22T17:35:00.003-05:00

Nate just went pee pee on the potty for the first time!!! I just mentioned it and he went in and peed. He was very motivated by the candy he received afterward and the post pee pee dance Mommy did! We will see where this goes. May be making a trip to get big boy underwear later. So excited!!

Easy Quick Delicious Tomatillo Salsa: All Saints Tomatillo Salsa

2009-07-21T21:17:00.028-05:00

This year we planted tomatillos in our garden so we could have some amazingly fresh (cheap) veggies at our disposal. One favorite is the Tomatillo. I am happy to say this little gem has been very prolific and it looks like we will have lots this year.

One of our favorites is this tomatillo salsa which I don’t have any name for so I will call it All Saints Tomatillo Salsa.

This tart, spicy as you make it salsa is amazing with chicken, steak, pork chops, grilled fish and even tortilla chips!

Recipe:

1lb fresh tomatillos
1-2 jalapenos
2 tbs minced garlic
2 tsp salt or to taste

Instructions:

Remove husks from tomatillos, rinse, and pat dry and place in a sauce pan. Jalapenos: for spicy sauce add one or two whole jalapenos to the sauce pan, for mild salsa use one & remove seeds and veins first. Add about 1/4 inch of oil to the sauce pan & cover with a lid cooking over medium high. Cook, turning once at about 3 minutes, till tomatillos are transparent and slightly browned but not popping, about 5-7 minutes. Remove from the heat and remove tomatillos and jalapenos to a blender. Add salt to taste and garlic. Blend till creamy and delicious!

Note: do not use a food processor as the salsa will not emulsify (combine) well.

Serve hot alongside entrees like grilled chicken, pork chops, fajitas, or great cold for dips with tortilla chips.

Leftovers (if any) keep well in the fridge.

Pool Fun. Addie Jane Style.

2009-07-21T16:08:00.001-05:00

Went to the pool with the family in VA twice last week. Here is miss Addison Jane modeling the classic black, white and red. Everybody make a silly face!

She looks like she is totally engrossed in the coolest song here.

Rock Star. Always.

Bud Phases

2009-07-20T16:19:00.008-05:00

I have been doing some self criticism lately, critiquing my motives, passions and goals in general. See I am thinking about some steps in my life and want to see if I am going through one of my weird Bud phases.

Bud phases?

My Grandpa Bud. I didn't really know him very well unfortunately, we lived about 12 hours apart, He sounded like such an interesting man though. I need to find out more about him. Something that makes me feel close to him though are some things I seem to have inherited from him.

Sadly, I did not inherit his sexy legs.

The first thing my mom ever mentioned was my love of cooking shows. Grandpa had his favorites and he would tune in to the cooking shows before Food TV ever existed. My mom would laugh at me in high school for sitting there absorbing cooking shows, I was a wild one. I went on to go to culinary school. It made me smile that she would comment on my cooking and also comment on my Grandpa, it made me feel close to him which I would have liked very much.

That hat says Super Grandpa!
(Thank you 1991 for perms & scrunchies)

Grandpa Bud loved a hobby. When he died his basement and attic were filled to the brim with all sorts of hobby stuff. He tried just about everything and stuck with just about none of it from what I could tell but I should really find out about that. Maybe he did. Anyways, when he died there was all this evidence of a man who tried it all, rock collecting and polishing ( I also collect rocks which he inspired), electric work, small wood carvings, glass collecting, fish collecting (I wonder if there is a name for people who have lots of fancy fish), really I could go on and on. One that also stood out in my mind was photography, something I have been playing with a lot too.

See I have played around with cooking, sewing, painting, crafting, and some others I can not think of right now. Each time I was passionate about that thing. I loved it, then it waned. I hate that about myself. I hate spending money on something and then not really doing it. I mean, I cook and love that but I spent a lot of (my) money on school and do not cook professionally. I bought a bunch of painting supplies and haven't done a thing with that in a while, my sewing machine broke so I had all these patterns and fabric sitting there. Clutter.

So photography. I can remember going to my aunt's house when I was little and seeing these rather large photos of mushrooms. Grandpa's prints. I love those orange mushrooms. I bought my first SLR at a garage sale when I was about 19 I think and remember tromping through the woods looking for anything and everything to point that thing at. I even looked for mushrooms. My grandpa used me as a subject when we visited once when I was about four. Sweet photos and nice for me to think about, my grandpa playing around trying to get me to look at the camera like I do with Ella now.

I love photography but can I tell you a secret? I feel like I am copying right now. See, I have some cousins Melanie, Rachel & Christy. Christy started her own photography business first and has gone in a different direction now, Rachel was off and running next and Melanie is doing a great job too! This is kind of strange and I feel unoriginal. Oh well. I am afraid I am just getting caught up in all the shutters going off and feel hisitant to "invest" money when I am nervous it will all end up cluttering up my closet. I really doubt that but still. I do not want to be a jack of all trades and a master of none. I love that I am excersising my brain creatively but I tend to get all 110% with a lot of things and then not so much as is evidence by the little projects I have around my house in different areas. (cough - unfinished baby quilt for my 2yo!)

So what is the point? Oh I have no idea. I am just talking. I love that I am like my Grandpa in this respect, that I will jump in there and try just about anything, it is just that lenses aren't so cheap as acrylic paints! What about you though, you ever like this? Or are you the opposite and wish you would try more things?

Puddle Jumping

2009-07-20T14:39:00.003-05:00

We went to have lunch with Daddy in the park today after a storm so there were lovely puddles all over the place. Just right to jump in, run through, plop in. Nate's toes were all raisin-y when we were done. Sorry Daddy had to miss out on the fun but someone has to bring home the bacon.

I love that man.

Nate looked at me, saw the camera and cheesed it up!

I ♥ Toes

2009-07-20T14:06:00.005-05:00

I love toes.

I also love puddle ballets!
To see more sweet feet head over to I ♥ Faces!

Dear Husbands of the World,

2009-07-17T18:00:00.003-05:00

Dear Husbands of the World,

Apparently we have been far too convincing in one not so small area. See, for centuries women across the world have been attempting to fool one specific sect of individuals, children. We have been trying to convince them that we are indeed all knowing, all seeing, semi-omniscient beings. (This does not apply to math homework - who remembers that stuff anyways?) We see all wrong doing, sense all gum thieving, hear all make-up bags being unzipped and in general can just sense when trouble is afoot.

There seems to have been a miscalculation in how effectively this farce was carried out. I would like to rectify something for all you men folk that is no doubt an ill after effect of how well your own mother, grandmothers, school teachers or maybe that creepy lady with that mole hair at the gas station who caught you stealing that gum convinced you of.

WE CAN NOT READ YOUR EVER LOVIN MIND!!! You do occasionally need to clue us in to what is going on up there! You know, so you don't get in trouble. I know, it seems counter intuitive.

Just don't tell the kids.

Thank you,

I ♥ Faces - Week 27

2009-07-13T09:35:00.004-05:00

"I GOT one! Can we take it home?"

Saw this guy getting all ready to head out into the surf at the beach one day in the early spring. I loved the focused intensity he had getting ready to head out into the cold, dark water and could not help but snap some photos.

For more head over to the always entertaining and very much addicting www.iheartfaces.com

The Best Daddy

2009-07-12T07:40:00.001-05:00

Yesterday Daddy suggested we go to the NC Zoo for the day!! Woo Hooo! So we packed up the monkeys and headed down to Asheboro for some fun. I love this family membership! Also, I don’t feel like editing photos and these look okay so I am just posting them as is. Monkey face! Ready, set, GO! Binoculars – of course. See it? See, they DO like each other.

First Photoshopped Photo

2009-07-09T09:25:00.007-05:00

This is my first photo edited in Photoshop. What do we think? ehh I will play with it more later. I didn't have enough time to really mess with it but here is something. Also need to figure out how best to save pics for posting on the internet, size, settings, color settings.... SO MUCH TO FIGURE OUT.

I also think I need to stop complaining about Ella not looking at the camera! Pretty girl.

New Process

2009-07-09T07:45:00.002-05:00

I am working with a new camera so it is a new process of course. Here are two photos I like of my babies. Nate was watching fireflies out the front window and Ella and Daddy were snuggling on the couch.

Truly an American Fourth of July

2009-07-06T09:37:00.004-05:00

I had a great 4th of July this year! It was spent with my in laws who are Mexican natives. It was great spending the day appreciating our country with those who have sacrificed so much to be here and chosen to be American. I was fortunate enough to be born here, something I certainly take for granted.

We spent the whole day swimming, playing impromptu volleyball, and generally listening to the music of giggling children, laughing adults and the grand finale of fireworks of course.

If Ella was forced to name a best friend this would certainly be her. Cristal and Ella get along like peas and carrots, peanut butter and jelly, waffles and syrup, tortillas and salsa verde. I love that she has a cousin her age who she gets to play with and hand out. I love Cristal!

I watched the ladies cooking so I could pick up some tips! The food is basically the same deal - just Mexican! Also my Aunt Julieta is the most amazing cook. Oh. My. Goodness. Love eating her food.

Hot Dogs = Salchuchas (Sausages)
Hamburgers = Carne Asada (Grilled Flank Steak)
Baked Beans = Frijoles (Pinto Beans)
Potato Salad = Arroz (Red Rice)
Catsup & Mustard = Salsa Verde & Salsa Guajillo
Buns = Tortillas!!! (corn not flour)

I just want to snatch Nate up and kiss him here with that little face!

Excuse the flash here. I needed a picture of the dress and she was modeling. Their first Push Pops while we waited for the fireworks.

We watched the fireworks at Kenan Stadium in Chapel Hill this year. We found a new spot to watch from with nice soft astroturf for the kids to play in while we waited. Man did they sleep hard that night!

I hope you all had a great day and really appreciated what it means to be American. It is more than a place, it is a value, a hope and a dream which we sometimes forget. Do not forget the sacrifice that went into making America the beautiful.

Hit that button! Go play too. Just for fun this week!

It is the 4th!

2009-07-04T07:13:00.000-05:00

Remember those who are on foreign soil today protecting our right to blog, complain, worship, dance, and wander where we might.

Thank you ladies and gentlemen of the military for protecting the many freedoms I take for granted. Happy 233rd Independence Day America!

Suffering for My Art

2009-07-02T08:24:00.001-05:00

When we went to the beach two weeks ago I saw a field of sunflowers growing at the Ft Fisher Ferry port. I also saw gigantic huge bloodthirsty horseflies buzzing around all over the place. I didn’t go get the photos and I regretted it. I beat myself up a little every time I don’t stop for a shot I know I want. I am currently training myself to stop no matter what.

My family has laughed at me for a very very long time about getting in weird positions, climbing into areas I shouldn’t be in and injuring myself for a photo. I am sure none of them would be surprised if I die in some freakish photography incident. I would be very proud to go out that way, I think.

When Alex & I went to the beach this past weekend we were just doing what we wanted, no kids determining the schedule. So if I wanted to tromp around with sandals on in a sandy field of flowers with blood sucking insects, by golly I was going to do it! So I did.

I very quickly went over to said field, literally danced around in a sandy field with sandals on trying to fend off mosquitoes and giant horseflies. I am sure all the cars waiting to board the ferry got a rather amusing show as I crouched, kicked, flailed, dodged and otherwise made a fool of myself for the photo. I took 7 frames, probably a record low number for me, and ran.

The icing on the cake was when I held still for a second and felt some searing pain in my ankle. I assumed it was a horsefly and smacked at the spot full force. Turns out it was 3 sand spurs that became embedded in my hand and ankle with the force of the smack. It is still swollen and itchy.

7 mosquito bites, one horsefly bite to the forehead, and about 15 puncture wounds later I had these to show for it. I like them. So happy I got a second chance at a missed opportunity. One is not usually so fortunate.

Family Reunion

2009-07-01T08:41:00.002-05:00

The kids and I spontaneously went to the NC Zoo in Asheboro yesterday because there was less than 99% humidity and the chances of that happening again this summer are pretty slim. We have a family membership so we need to make good use of it. By the way, those are the best deals!

Yesterday was the first time we went and didn’t have to take a whole bunch of junk either! We were free from diaper bags, strollers and all the like. Just my camera bag with a diaper shoved in it. We just took our time and relaxed running around the zoo where we wanted.

We spent an extra long time at the sea lions because, well – they are awesome. A little snuggle time while we were waiting for the tram, err train, sorry Nate.So glad that motion blur came out.

By the end of the day they were totally exhausted. I love those quiet drives home after running the kids ragged. Daddy was home so we got pizza for dinner and popped in a movie. A great day!

Juuuust the Two of Us…

2009-06-30T19:43:00.001-05:00

This weekend I was a happy girl indeed. I asked my mom and dad to take the kids for us for a weekend sometime a few times and we just never made it happen. This past weekend that changed.

View Larger Map

We logged over 800 miles within our own state, North Carolina. It is hard for us to find places in our state that neither of us had been but we checked out lots this weekend together. Some places (umm Sealevel & Cedar Island) we will not be taking a second visit to unless we are just there to catch the Ocracoke ferry (book ahead) to the outer banks.

We slept in a tent under the stars on Friday night at the Carolina Beach State Park, very nice place and I did not have to shower in front of anyone which was a concern. We went to see a movie together, we ate when and where we wanted and even got to eat the crackers that came with our salads. We are used to surrendering those to the kids.

Saturday we had planned on staying at this campground in Sealevel, NC. We got there, scoped it out and while it was not in any way fancy or upscale it was quiet, the tent area was empty and secluded and it was cheap. We went and paid for the site, drove back over there and got out to set up. Then I realized what I had done wrong. I had not gotten OUT of the car when we looked at the site. As soon as Alex got out the state bird of NC attacked him, the mosquito. They usually pass over him but he was dancing around smacking himself. They got me next. We left to get bug spray but later decided we would not be returning there. So we were homeless.

That night we went fishing till 1:00am and then were going to drive the two hours back to where we were going to camp. Alex and I were very tired at that point and he decided to park so we could sleep instead of driving off the road. We went to one of our favorite beaches in NC, Topsail Island and tried to get comfortable to sleep in the car. I guess maybe one of those mosquitoes followed us in the car because around 4:00am one of them started buzzing around my ear.

I learned another important lesson. Never ever, in a fit of tired uncomfortable rage at 4:00am, decide to spray bug spray in an ENCLOSED vehicle. After fumigating myself, my husband and my dog I jumped out of the car hacking and spitting and decided forget it. I grabbed the sleeping bag, threw it down in the parking lot, realized it was a gravel parking lot, moved it to the bottom of a sand dune, crawled in, flopped over, coughed and flopped over some more. Then I saw it. The sky.

I have not seen so many stars in my life as I did that night. It was amazing and so comforting. I fell asleep to the sound of the ocean and the sight of the stars. So serene.

I also slept through some rain apparently because when I awoke my sleeping bag was wet on the outside and the sand had droplet prints all over it! I was tired. We had waxed poetic about sleeping in but we were up at dawn both mornings. There was much to be accomplished like hand holding, photo taking, fishing, kissy face, eating grown up food, exploring and just generally remembering why we like each other.

We had fun with the “camping” part of it even though really we were just using the tent to sleep in over night. We will do it again and we think the kids will love it. We might be camping people. We are not “camping in the summer in NC” people though. Those people are insane.

Did I mention we went without our kids? Haaaaaaaaaaalleluiah!!

Thank you baby! I had a fantastic weekend. We will do it again, sooner than later I hope.

Topsail Beach, NC

2009-06-29T20:40:00.004-05:00

Topsail Beach, NC a little after dawn.

The water was warm, the breeze was cool and the boy and girl were both very contented.

Fierce.

2009-06-27T07:34:00.002-05:00

Have A Nice Day

2009-06-26T08:02:00.001-05:00

Queen Anne’s Lace, one of my favorite flowers from my childhood. We used to take long hikes when we lived in the Netherlands and these grew everywhere. Elegant and simple.

Year Eight Investment Portfolio

2009-06-25T08:21:00.001-05:00

Investments. Alex and I make all sorts of investments. Four years ago we bought a house. We have invested quite a bit of blood, sweat and money into this house, more his blood and sweat but I was helping replace windows while I was quite pregnant and I wore my sexy old Italian lady costume. We invested into our house to make it better for ourselves as well as hopefully getting a return on our investment when we sell our home. We now, finally, have a 401K plan. Even though I know very little about the stock market and try not to look at how much or little is in that account we are investing in our future. We invest in our education, tools, and experience. We have two monkeys, not real monkeys, our kids. Man how we invest in them! There is one thing we haven't invested in much, our relationship.

Oh yea.

This weekend Alex and I are headed to the beach, alone this time. My parents are taking the kids for us and they will also be at the beach, just not with us.

See Alex and I have had a hard half a year here. It has been challenging to say the least but we are pushing forward. We have not been investing much in each other over our relationship. By investing I mean a lot of things but he and I have the same love language, quality time. Quality time is short to come by in our lives between two kids, multiple jobs and life's endless little things. I miss him, he misses me. We used to go away a lot together, we would run to the beach for the weekend, take a drive to the mountains to relax, head off to Charleston for a little romance. Since we have had kids we have had exactly two nights together without the kids, one was so the kids wouldn't be in the house while we fought, the other was the night before a yard sale (just try selling the kid's stuff with them around). Neither nights were romantic. We also don't have a babysitter.

So how do you get time away from the kids and still pay the bills? We are camping! I say that with an enthusiastic and optimistic exclamation point, you know, so it won't all go horribly wrong. I really have no idea what we are doing this weekend, I really don't care as long as we are doing it alone. I told my mom we could go to the dump and as long as I don't have the kids I will be happy. We wont be doing that but I will be pretty easy to please.

I am very thankful for parents I trust who love to watch my kids for me on occasion.

I need to go get an air mattress so we can sleep. Isn't it great that air mattresses are perfectly acceptable camping accessories now? This aint yer daddy's campin!

Dressing to the Nines

2009-06-24T07:04:00.001-05:00

What is more fun than dress up? After our father’s day lunch on Saturday we retired to my parent’s house for dress up per Ella’s request. She was in rare form and allowed lots of camera time. Nate had a blast in the dress up stuff as well. What beautiful babies.

Nate looks pretty good in a cowboy hat I must say.

I love that they can go to Gran & Poppie’s house, have at it and relax. They have the best time with the little trucks, dress up bin, and toys that they have for the little monkeys. Thank you guys!

Nikon D60

2009-06-23T13:53:00.002-05:00

Last weekend my cousin Melanie let me borrow her camera so I got to play! I tried to mess around with it in different lighting conditions and have a little fun. Here are a few photos from the weekend.

Thank you Melanie! You rock.

I ♥ Faces - Lets Hear It for My Boys

2009-06-22T08:57:00.003-05:00

The theme this week over at I ♥ Faces is "Lets hear it for the boys".
Go over and join in or just check out some amazing photos!

In the Garden Now..

2009-06-19T11:48:00.004-05:00

See that on the bottom right? That is the packet of Snow Pea seeds that got left outside in a plastic bag. They sprouted INSIDE THE BAG and grew!! Guess I need to get on the ball and plant them in the ground.

My helper pollinating the tomatillos.

Squash Squash and more Squash!!! I need to look for a recipe for squash blossom soup – one of Alex’s favorite from home.

See underneath? Squash! & Tomatoes

A Tiny Cucumber!! & Cantaloupe Plant

Some of my tomatoes (foreground) are almost 5 feet tall. My tomatillos (background) are over 5 feet tall! Pay no attention to all the weeds.

45c & 25 minutes Worth of Fun: Shaving Cream

2009-06-18T15:09:00.003-05:00

Kids bored? Raining all day? Feel like the ~~monsters~~ kids have been using your gray matter as their own personal inflatable jumping castle? Ready to string them up by their cute little tiny toe nails?

Wait! You too can have hours, okay really about 20 minutes, of uninterrupted, okay well within reason, of down time resulting in you feeling refreshed and re-energized. Okay, I didn’t really feel refreshed or re-energized but it was about 20 minutes where I was a cool mom and we were all having fun together. That’s awesome in my book.

The Setup:

One plastic bin: I used an under the bed storage box but any plastic container will work
One or two large beach towels or a blanket you need to wash
Kids
Shaving Cream: I got a Value Sized Barbasol Shaving Cream can for $1.00 at the dollar store. It smells great. I used about 1/2 a can.

If you are a clean freak (this cleans up very easily and wont ruin anything) you can do this in your bathtub.

The directions are very detailed and complicated….

Have. At. It. Get. Messy. Yes, you too.

You can even make it educational. Practice shapes with the little ones, letters and numbers with bigger ones, quiz SAT words with the really big ones.

Also, your kid’s teachers will thank you, those of you with little ones. This helps those with tactile issues get used to having messy stuff on them in a safe friendly environment.

Ella dove in there but Nate was a little hesitant. One finger at a time.

He doesn’t look happy at all does he?

Ahhh. Good times. Good times. This scored me about one hour of fun because I just moved them right to the tub afterward. Niiiice.

Hey You

2009-06-17T18:43:00.002-05:00

You know what I think?

A simple Oy Vey.

Do You Have Any Vinegar?

2009-06-17T14:07:00.003-05:00

Did I ever tell you about that time when I was pregnant with Nate and I was accosted in the parking lot? No. I haven’t. It is kind of funny and kind of annoying and kind of threatening and kind of thought provoking.

Let me start by explaining that while the military took me many different places and a good bit of my family are actually from the north, I am essentially a polite southern girl. I rarely am ever rude to people. If anything I will just politely run away from people who are, well, annoying. Usually this works but sometimes they follow you. Ahh, yes. The followers, they can smell politeness, they can smell “I wont reject you.” I suppose it is good to smell of niceness, politeness and the opposite of rejection but sometimes I wish I could invoke my inner Yankee. I know it has to be in there somewhere.

This brings me to Harris Teeter. I was about 2 months pregnant with my son and working part time opposite shifts of my husband. I had a cold and since I was pregnant I was forced to use Tylenol. Boo. I was still on the clock but I ran to the HT to get some medicine really quick, or so I thought.

I was standing there staring blankly at the medicine aisle for what seemed like forever trying to narrow down what KIND of crappy non working Tylenol cold medicine I would waste my money on in a desperate attempt to unclog the mess in my head (pre Neti Pot discovery) along with someone else getting something else.

When I left and went out to the parking lot this someone else approached me. They had been waiting for me outside. (My first indication right?) Someone else was a she, older than me, normal looking. I will call her Olive Oyl. She approached me and said she had noticed me in the medicine aisle and wanted to help me or something of the sort.

I don’t remember the specifics of everything she said but she was nice and seemed sweet. Olive Oyl said she wanted to bless me or something and while I tried to explain that I was on the clock she said it would make her feel so happy and it would just be a second. I realized then she was not going away. Ever. I gauged that it would be more expedient to let her do her thing real quick than discuss it. I was trying to be nice to the lady.

“Real quick” turns into her digging in the back of her vehicle for some blessed oil. Yep. Okay, I am a Christian and while this means very different things to many different people I am not into the whole blessing, laying of hands etc thing. It is good for others, just not my thing. Not wanting to disrespect her and her beliefs (and being a southerner with no backbone) I let it continue.

I don’t know what I thought she was going to do for me, I really just kind of thought she was going to pray for me maybe hold my hands or something, I don’t know. What Olive Oyl did next surprised me. She suggested I drink some of this oil. Umm, lady. She said it would heal me. Umm, Olive Oyl, No. I explained, as I was sensing somewhere deep inside my heritage as a Yankee, that I didn’t know her and I was not going to drink anything she gave me. Now I know, reading this your thinking “well why the hell didn’t you just walk away?” I don’t know. She wasn’t creepy or weird, she was genuine and she really thought that this blessed oil was the shiznitz. I don’t know, it felt disrespectful to just leave her hanging and I didn’t want to insult her faith. So I explained that I was pregnant thinking SURELY she will leave me alone because you just don’t mess with preggers right? Wrong. Stupid stupid.

To wrap up a long story I left with an oily face, oily hands, and an oily uniform shirt. SHE TOUCHED MY BELLY. Rawr. DONT TOUCH PREGNANT WOMEN ON THE BELLY!!!! I was only 2 months pregnant. All she was touching was my FAT!! (Can you tell that part annoys me?) Olive oil on my white UNIFORM.

It was shorter to let her do it than fight her about it or explain my stance on the whole thing.

So why 3 years later does this still bother me? Well, aside from the fact that Olive Oyl (a well meaning stranger who actually suggested I go back into the Harris Teeter and get my money back) touched my belly, it challenged my faith.

See, I don’t know if I believe in “healing.” Okay so to be honest, I really don’t believe in “Healing.” I think those people on TV are nut jobs trying to get people’s money. I think the people who have been “healed” are just confused desperate people suffering from a placebo effect. In short, I am cynical.

I do believe that people can be healed but I don’t think that God needs or even would do it through Olive Oil. Could, sure, would not really. But, what if? See Olive Oyl said to me something along the lines of “If you believe than you will be healed.” It took a great deal of control that day not to a. laugh or b. laugh or c. laugh. I wish I had the presence of mind to respectfully express my views on the subject but my mind does not function well under those circumstances so I was mind boggled.

I still think about it and really wonder if I got sick or my husband or child, what would my reaction be. It does make you wonder.

I say all of this not to insult anyone's belief of course, I am opening this up for discussion. I do believe in miracles, I just don't think God needed some olive oil rubbed on my belly if he wanted to heal my cold. I do think my faith was being prodded, poked, provoked and in general questioned. I think that is good.

So what about you? What do you think? What would you have done? Would you have channeled your inner Yankee, ignored her from the beginning, gone back into the grocery store and gotten some vinegar and veggies for a “you’ve been healed salad”?

Bloodsuckers, Rain and Summer

2009-06-15T16:09:00.001-05:00

Apparently we are in for a bit of rain this week and this morning the kids were going at is very early. I needed out of the house. The summer break is good but it sure does require some child running. Our yard is one large den for ticks and mosquitoes this summer so the yard is on hiatus. Ella had a very dramatic run in with a tick yesterday that pretty much did it for me. Poor kid, you would have thought it was going to hack off her leg but I guess I don’t blame her.

Anyways, so off to the park we went. The thunder started booming but I managed to run them a little and snap a few pictures. I think Ella and I might be coming to an understanding on the camera thing.. I think once I have a camera and lens that will catch the brief second she will look at the camera for me I will be in good shape! Today she was very obliging and looked at me a few times.

I ♥ Faces - Sepia

2009-06-15T08:21:00.004-05:00

It is sepia week at I ♥ Faces
Go join in!!

I ♥ belly laughs from a soon to be Mom

and I ♥ juicy strawberries at the farmer's market!

but who doesn't?

Keri & Matt – Mebane, NC Maternity Photographs

2009-06-14T13:36:00.001-05:00

Maternity shoot number one on Thursday, shoot number two on Friday! Matt and Keri are some friends from church who I knew I wanted to take photos of as soon as I found out they were receiving this blessing. They are very cute together and I had a great time freaking them out with my hands off way of shooting. I had 35 shots before Keri even knew I was taking photos!

Matt’s parents are retired professional photographers so there is no shortage of absolutely amazing photos in their home, terrifying for me but you know, I trudged on and recomposed myself.

I realize I need to build confidence in what I do and how I do it. I have a more observational style of shooting, or at least I try. My favorite photos are those that are snapped between poses when they think I am not shooting; those beautiful laughs, the relaxed gazes, the unposed caress.

What a sweet couple and what truly amazing parents they will be together! Congratulations, I am so very happy for you and I am so excited to meet Luke. Thank you for letting me help you remember this amazing time in your lives!

Click here to see more photos.

Greg & Becky – Hillsborough, NC Maternity Photos

2009-06-12T11:00:00.002-05:00

Meet Greg & Becky. They are on their 3rd and final pregnancy and I got to shoot it! We decided we needed some belly photos and the baby held out so that could happen. They have two adorable boys and baby number three should be a girl!

Congratulations guys! Thank you for letting me capture this for you and thank you for being my first official photo shoot! I think everyone will agree Greg that there is little chance of her not being gorgeous, sorry you will just have to get those older brothers of hers to help fend off the boys!

Click here for more photos.

Ready, Set, ….Exhale

2009-06-10T17:48:00.003-05:00

This past weekend my family got the opportunity to take off for the beach. We packed up and headed out early Saturday and stayed in the Fort Fisher area of NC till Monday afternoon.

Over the weekend we went to the Aquarium, the pool, the beach, we went on a date, yes you read that right – a date! Alex and I went out for ice cream and a movie and had a very nice night – alone.

Alex looking all GQ

We were also able to rent a canoe and go out in the waterway a couple times. That was fun and we even saw an alligator out looking for fish in the waterway. SO COOL! No photos though. Something about an unstable canoe in a large deep waterway, a curious five year old, a curious water loving 2 year old and my camera that just didn’t scream “great combination” to me.

(Some guy fishing – not Alex.)

My beautiful sister Grace! Also the bugs that ate us alive.

(Ella just saw this and said, “you took a picture of my butt?!?” Let the embarrassment begin)

If you want to go live vicariously through some other vacationer’s photos go check out …

Mommy by Day, Wanderlust by Night

2009-06-05T16:32:00.001-05:00

When Alex and I met we were working at a hotel. This hotel, while offering little in actual money or benefits did offer one fantastic perk. Room discounts. I have to take a moment to mourn the loss of the beloved hotel discount. Pause. Okay, I am better now.

We started dating in September, were more serious by November and by Valentines day we decided to take our first trip together.

Let me back up with some information. I love love love to travel. If I could travel and take my family with me everywhere without starving, going into massive debt or being required to do anything immoral to pay for it, I would. I dream about travel, I long to travel, I need to travel. I say need because I actually do think I need to travel. If I don’t I start experiencing what I am pretty sure a heroine addict goes through during withdrawl, maybe not quite that dramatic but still, I need to travel.

During courtship it was pretty much established that Alex had been many places but seen none of them. His job took him many places but he went to work and went back “home” and never really thought much of it. Occasionally he would go to the beach to do some fishing if he was on the coast but not always. It just didn’t really cross his mind much. Then he met me.

One of our favorite things to do when we were dating was to jump in the car and just drive. He does like to explore. I would often realize we had been in the car talking for quite some time and neither of us had any clue where in NC we were. On a few occasions we were no longer in NC. This was pre-kids of course.

My wandering spirit and Alex’s willingness to explore has let us have some good times without really ever having gone anywhere. Back to Valentines day. We decided to use said hotel discount for a nice place in Charleston, SC. Not a bad place to visit for Valentines mind you. $39.00 a nice for a four star hotel, $29.00 if your being cheap and want to stay at a very nice three star. Occasionally we stayed free at certain hotels, the really nice ones. Boston downtown was free, Miami downtown $29.00, Washington DC 39.00, Charleston SC 39.00, etc etc. How I miss that discount.

Though he and I never really got to go on a honeymoon and we have never even flown together we have done a nice bit of travel together and I am so grateful he is up for me dragging him about. Boy do we log some miles on our cars.

We have long agreed that if either of us had smoked we wouldn’t have married each other. I could easily add if he didn’t like to travel I wouldn’t have married him.

We may not jet set off into the sunset yet but we have done pretty well for ourselves in the last eight years together and not long goes by without us getting some time logged in the car chatting it up. I hope my kids inherit my wandering spirit. Even if it takes them away from me I hope they have my wanderlust. I have corrupted Daddy enough that we should be able to influence them a bit.

we are off to the beach this weekend for some much needed time away. I will have photos to post when I am back I promise. Alex, thank you for indulging me baby. Your a great travel companion!

Insert Witty Catching Title Here

2009-06-04T21:48:00.002-05:00

I try not to complain on here much but I do also try to be as open and honest as possible. I think it is hard to really let people in but it is an important part of life to allow yourself to be exposed. I think this is the only way we can really make valuable and genuine connections. As much of my opportunity for connection seems to be online lately I try as I can to make it real. Lately it has just been real shallow. There has been little depth to my writing and it has most certainly been photo centric. That is okay. I am always open to a good honest chat so if you feel the need to pick my brain feel free to let me know.

So what has been on my mind? I suppose I hadn’t really been trying to focus on much. I was able to divert my mind with other things for a while. Now it is summer time and little is around to absorb my mind elsewhere. I think the past year is catching up with me a bit now.

I still don’t want to complain on here - so I won’t. I have been made more thankful for the love of my husband and the heath and vivacity of my kids and I try to dwell on those things. Good gravy sometimes my brain hurts from all the vivacity of those kids.

That is why I have been posting a lot of photos, it is a nice respite from other not so relaxing requirements. I am having so much fun with it and I have been setting goals, long term goals. I have lots I need to learn, do and buy but all in good time. I think I am improving.

Ella is very much looking forward to Kindergarten and is missing her preschool buddies. I am missing her being more worn out and foresee many small trips to run them both ragged in our summer plans.

I am gardening. Or rather, I planted stuff and I am trying not to let it shrivel up and die. Vegetables, herbs and fruits for my culinary adventures. I can grow weeds with a vengeance let me assure you so if you need tips on weed growing you just let me know. Also, if you need grass to grow all you need do is plow the area and plant vegetables. Grass is all over the place where I do not want it.

Really all of us are tired. Alex has been working a second job for about 9 months and wow is it catching up to us. By catching up to us really I mean chasing us down, beating the tar out of us and then sticking it’s old bazooka gum in our hair. I am torn between dramatically begging him to quit and sucking it up because of the extra income. I will let him decide but this week he worked 7 days out of 7 ALL DAY. 7am-8pm most days, 11 tonight and tomorrow. As a result the kids have been staying up till past 9 so they could see him, and him see them, for a few minutes in the evening. He works so hard. I would rather work myself but the numbers just don’t add up and neither do the opportunities. Boo. I am very thankful for the extra work and additional income especially now when so many have none of either but I will be exponentially grateful when the necessity no longer outweighs the time away from loved ones.

In the meantime, this weekend we will have a short and strictly budgeted weekend at the beach. YAY!!!! We were supposed to go camping to save some money but that didn’t work out. I am very glad to have some time with the four of us together and anticipate a nice long exhale on the beach somewhere.

Under The Apple Tree - Part Two

2009-06-04T16:51:00.003-05:00

We went to see Lindsey the other day in Boone, NC and decided to have a picnic under an apple tree on the parkway. I mean, she decided to take us to this apple tree she knew of on a hill with a beautiful view. She knows things like where the best apple trees for picnics are so if you are in the area and need a tip just let me know and I can hook you up.

We hauled some wine, a bunch of fresh fruit, a slew of peanut butter sandwiches, local cheese and some other delectables up a hill and had a nice relaxing lunch. The kids decided to show they liked me by cooperating with the camera for me. See the photos here at part one.

That’s the mommy mobile there and those are all blackberry plants. Nice.

Hiking up a grassy hill of buttercups. Thanks Lindsey. We will do it again soon babe!

Under the Apple Tree - Part One

2009-06-03T13:00:00.006-05:00

We went to the mountains again yesterday. We picnicked under an apple tree and I came out of the trip with some shots of the kids that I am very happy with. I also had to do little to no adjustments on my exposure which I am very excited about.

I love the cleft in his chin. Just like his Daddy.

Have A Nice Day

2009-06-01T10:38:00.003-05:00

Ahhh. Exhale.

Just South of Boone

2009-05-31T16:17:00.004-05:00

(click me!)

If you get on the Blue Ridge Parkway just south of Boone, NC and head south you will be heading to a small slice of paradise.

This stretch of highway includes scenic overlook after scenic overlook of beautiful blue mountains, colored distinctively bluer as they fade into the distance.

A short walk down a path off the parkway will bring you to Linville Falls. The soothing sound of the water falling over the rocks is as peaceful as the quiet forest that encompasses them. The water has carved through these amazingly curved layers of rock. You can hike up another path to get a view of the falls from above.

(Click me too. This is a stitched photo combining about 30 photos to get a wide view of Linville Falls.)

Jump in the car and take a little trip!
It is an amazing view from the top.

On This Day in the Year 2004

2009-05-28T15:54:00.004-05:00

Yesterday 5 years ago the world was short one small child. My world was short one small child. You came into the world quite quickly after one long night babe. You didn't really wait for anyone to get to mommy's side except daddy so the two of us had you all to ourselves for the first few moments. With your arrival you brought joy, laughter and love like I had never known. You also brought a lot of poop. Part of the laughter was watching daddy gag as he tried to clean off that new baby poop. Ahhh good times good times. Thank you sweetie.

You and I were a team from the start. When my sister in laws, your aunts, came over they just knew that I was letting you sit in a poopie diaper because man did you smell bad. I kept telling them that you were just gassy but they thought I was just a silly new mother who didn't know a thing. I assured them you could stink up a room better than any World War II vet digesting an entire war's worth of rationed canned beans but they didn't believe me. As they were opening up your diaper I looked over at you and thought please Ella, do not have poop in there. As your Aunt looked up at me and shrugged I knew we were homegirls, we were a team. I would have fist bumped you on that, your thrid day, if you hadn't been across that room. I had not been so proud to be a mom yet as I was at that moment. Thats my girl! I proceded to sweep you up in my arms and I trotted triumphanty up the stairs to my room feeling like maybe I wasn't going to completely fail at this mom thing. We are still girls baby.

Your daddy's girl though, don't get me wrong. The sweetest sound in the world is you beating the mess out of your daddy and giggling away while he moans, groans, laughs and incites more craziness.

Today your daddy took off work just to be with you on your birthday. What a good daddy. He must like you. You have spent the day running amok in the Tinkerbell dress and crown we bought last night. You were very much aware of the whole present thing this year. You know Ella, you used to be good with just one present, the box it came in and wrapping paper. We will work on that okay?

We started off the day like we love to start them, snuggling in bed. Then we turned on Night at the Museum just for fun. After we got dressed up all fancy we went to play at that McDonalds they just built with the amazing playground. Youv'e been wanting to take daddy there for about 6 months. It was his idea to go there today. After playing we went to see the next Night at the Museum movie and crammed ourselves with candy as a special birthday treat. You promptly passed out when we got home.

Mommy has more fun planned for later though. In the meantime, how about you slow down on the getting older? In the last year you have grown about 9 feet taller, .9 oz heavier, and 6 years wiser.

We had been doing the whole birthday countdown since your early birthday party with your classmates last week. When I noted on day 3 of the countdown that 5 years ago you were still in my tummy I apparently opened that one of for conversation. "But how did I get out?" you inquisitively demanded. A simple answer didn't suffice and when I ansered that a hole opened up when a mommy was going to have a baby you immediately pulled up your shirt and stuck your finger in your belly button. No no, not that hole. You were pretty done with that conversation when I explained it was down where you go pee. Phew.

You are so loved Ella. What a blessing you have been for these 5 years!
I am looking forward to the next!

Just Pretend

2009-05-27T14:05:00.005-05:00

Nate has just moved into a new phase of play and I just find it so sweet and fascinating. He is pretending. His mind has expanded into a place only he can see. No more is his play just concrete using what he sees around him. Now it is as fluid as a finger airplane's course across the sky or a fish swimming through the air. He is enamored with things with wheels, has a new love for shaking his booty, a quite a unique style of dancing, and a love for stealing the spotlight from his sister only because she wants it not because he does. He makes us laugh.

Today he and I shared a meal. He cooked pancakes and sausage and shared it with me. He took his chubby little fingers and dipped them into his palm pulling out bites of "yummy panicakes" and served them to me. "Licious Mommy?" he asked. "Thank you Nate, it is delicious!" And so are you my sweet boy.

Anatomy 101

2009-05-27T07:29:00.004-05:00

Ella: "Nate, why do you have a wee wee?"
Me: "Because he is a boy and boys have wee wees."
Ella: Pause for dramatic effect. "Daddy has a wee wee. A big GIANT wee wee!!"

These are the things that concern me about kindergarten starting in the fall.

Alex, I posted about your big giant wee wee for the whole internet to read. Your welcome honey. This makes me wonder about this post again though.....

I ♥ Faces - Silhouette

2009-05-26T17:10:00.003-05:00

Doing another I ♥ Faces thing this week.
Silhouette was the theme this week. Go join in and check out the other entries!!

Nate checking out the Harbor Seals.
I love those cheeks and sweet chubby fingers.

Strawberry Day at The NC Farmer's Market

2009-05-26T15:44:00.005-05:00

A couple weeks ago the kids and I needed an outing so we decided to head to the NC State Farmer's Market in Raleigh. They were having "Strawberry Day"!! Yummy!!! Upcoming events include; crawfish day, blueberry day, peach day, and watermelon day. I think we may have to do a repeat with a few of these.

For Nate & Ella it pretty much went like this the whole time: Approach stand, wait a second for someone to look at big pleading eye balls, respond "Yes Pweeze" or "Yes please" to "Would you like a strawberry?", shove strawberry in mouth making yummy noises, giggle at the other sibling's face when they saw all the strawberry juice running down their chin, move on to next stand while still attempting to eat previous strawberry, rinse lather repeat.

I just laughed at how wide eyed they would get again in front of each subsequent strawberry stand. They would both look in amazement at all the red juicy goodness and turn on the charm for more free strawberries. I had to cut them off because I feared the farmers would suffer losses that season from my children alone they consumed so many. They were amazing. We bought a huge basket full and they did not go to waste.

So what about you? Ever visit your state's farmer's market or your local market? Not only is it a fun outing for everyone but it is a fantastic way to support your local economy and benefit from the freshest produce around. Our strawberries were picked THAT morning! So, go find yours!! Saturday mornings are so fun!

That is my daughter making eye contact with the camera!

3:00pm Memorial Day

2009-05-25T08:14:00.004-05:00

At 3:00pm today I will stop what I am doing to remember. Today I remember friends, today I remember family, today I remember strangers. I will bless the active duty men and women who serve away from their families, friends and loved ones. I will thank the veterans who served our country and take with them daily reminders of the sacrifice they gave. I will remember those who gave their lives to make this a country I have the freedom to enjoy. I am safer for their service and I thank them.

If you don't pray just take a moment to be silent. Go set a reminder on your cell - go! Enjoy your hot dogs, hamburgers, families and friends!

Muddled Mommy Had A Farm....

2009-05-24T16:54:00.003-05:00

the herb garden

This year with the encouragement of my friend Jennifer (if you had a blog I would link it here you know, get on that) I decided to finally jump in with the vegetable garden. I have had an herb garden with a couple established things in it for the four years we have lived here. I have had thyme, rosemary and what turned out to be oregano when the weeds were beaten back.

basil, cilantro & thyme

Now, in the herb garden I have:

Rosemary
Thyme
Oregano
Cilantro which we use SO MUCH of in our house
Basil and Sweet Basil
Lavender
Dill
Carrots (what - that's an herb isn't it?)
Mint and more I have forgotten I am sure

one of the experimental plots and the kid's fav place to worm hunt

the main garden - notice the 5 foot fence.

In the Vegetable gardens (4 different plots to see where is best) I have planted:

Jalapenos
Tomatoes - Heirloom, roma, cherry, and Big Boy
Green Peppers
Cucumbers
Zucchini
Squash
Watermelon
Cantaloupe
Onions
Beans
Okra
Tomatillos - SOOO Excited about these. If they will produce all the effort will be worth it.

If I can grow salsa I will save so much money this year. We use all those ingredients so much in our cooking. I have bought few plants and started most things from seeds. So much cheaper! Do not get me wrong, I have very little hope to actually produce much but so far we are doing alright. Not everything is dead yet and that is so much better than previous effort which was thwarted by ~~Satan's little helpers~~ deer. I liked deer before that. I tolerate them now.

The kids have loved helping and my hope is that if they plant it, water it, grow it and harvest it they will also eat it. I know they have loved finding worms for it.

Plants top to bottom left to right: 1: ? - Kids & Daddy planted these seeds. They could be cantaloupe or squash. 2 green onions (aren't they so cute!) 3. Big Boy tomatoes 4. Jalapeno 5. Tomatillo 6. Zucchini.

I am not using any chemicals on my plants so I don't have to worry about the kids, well water or dog so I used this interesting product to deter deer and rabbits. What is the number one ingredient? Putrescent egg solids. Oh yea baby. Let me tell you, that smells as good as you would think. It seems to be working though! So what do you think? Locals, hopefully you will be getting a plethora of fresh healthy vegetables from me this year.

So?

"My Like It..."

2009-05-24T16:29:00.002-05:00

"My like it laybuuug" - Nate
The kids are really liking the bugs this year.
Those are my babies!! Good job guys!
Mommy loves your spirit.

What?

2009-05-23T18:52:00.006-05:00

Did you miss me? I have missed me. Do you ever just loose yourself?
Maybe it was the missing ~~left arm~~ computer, maybe it is life catching up with me but when I got the computer back last Friday I just could not make anything happen on here.

I promised some posts, photos or not, while my computer was gone but I didn't realize I would be transported back to 1997. I was functioning on my spare computer, a Goodwill find for the kids to bang on, at dial up speeds so d o i n g a p o s t was miiiind numbing. You guys know my mind isn't too there on a normal day.

I have been a busy little bee lately with preschool ending so now the summer for me has officially begun. Play time!!!

On my brain lately: Birth control, trying to be more social, what to do with the kids over the summer, and camping. The kids will be with Gran & Poppi for the weekend in two weeks and I AM SO EXCITED. Alex and I are due for some time alone together so we are taking off camping, our first time together. Might not be possible to be more excited.

A Mac A PC and Me

2009-04-30T08:59:00.003-05:00

I am temporarily a mac people. An old Mac. A sad old mac. My PC, an HP, is not well. My sweet fast entertainment laptop is so slow and only really works when it sees fit which is quite seldom. I called HP and talked to them for hours, they sent me a new hard drive and Vista disks. Days later I now need to send them my computer so they can check my motherboard. I will be without my computer and the ability to upload any photos onto my blog for approximately 7-9 business days plus shipping and handling. Boo.

You can expect some introspective posts in the meantime I suppose. Dun Dun Duuuuuun!

Today I am taking the kids to the state farmers market for strawberry day and tomorrow I am off to Boone to see my sister Lindsey just for fun.

I am sorry it has been a little photo heavy and content light around here lately. I am just sort of obsessing about the photo stuff a lot lately. Cheers guys!

Also to those of you who have talked to me about the blog lately, I really appreciate the encouragement. It is nice to have a positive response when you put yourself out there, especially at church. If you dig through my blog you will find a lot of honest information about me which I don't mind sharing if it means someone else might benefit from my reality. You guys are great and knowing I am not always talking to myself, like I feel most of the time when I am faced with the glazed over looks of my children, makes me feel slightly more involved in the world around me and that is always a good thing.

I ♥ Faces - Reflection

2009-04-27T13:54:00.004-05:00

It is time for I ♥ Faces again! This week's theme is reflections. Go join in!

My First "Shoot"!

2009-04-25T17:05:00.006-05:00

I did a "shoot" last weekend of my niece Addison who will soon be 3 months. I was so nervous I had to kick everyone out but my sister and the baby. I bought props, had a plan and all these ideas of creative shots I wanted to get. Addison was all ready and doing great and then....... four hours later I realized OH MY GOODNESS it is FOUR hours later!!! Good Grief!!! Time flies when your an obsessed perfectionist enamored by every tiny nuance of your niece.

So I realized what I most need to work on in the area of photography is time management. I didn't get to 70% of what I wanted to do. Oh well.

I was very frustrated with my camera that day because speed was an issue. Addison actually laughed, like sweet belly laughs, for the first time that day and I pretty much missed them. Not entirely but the photos are not usable. Boo.

I fully expected to get poop on my fabrics while we were shooting. Miss Addison did not disappoint. Girl pooped through 4 layers of blankets etc so I also learned about the saturation factor of newborn poop!

All in all it was great and I am happy I came out with some I like. Addison was so wonderful and I even got a few of Laura & Addison together that I still need to edit. I still have over 800 photos so I haven't edited many. I did want to share some with you so here they are!

So?

I am just happy I had a few that weren't blurry.
After looking at the first set I almost cried from all the blur.
Mommy likes them though so that is what counts! Right Laura?

One for the Grandparents

2009-04-22T20:06:00.005-05:00

This one is just chock full of ~~nuts~~ grandbabies so this one is for your Grandparents. We went to the park one day so the kids could play (really so I could take pictures of them.)

Dancing with her shadow!

Fluffies!

2009-04-22T15:03:00.003-05:00

Fluffies! Make a wish!

People - Seriously. I Am Tired.

2009-04-20T16:30:00.003-05:00

I feel like I have been on the road forever now. I have been here, there and back again a few weekends in a row. I have snapped an insane number of photos in the last 2 weeks. Really. Insane. I miss church, where we have been missing the last 5 weeks save the one we were working the nursery. We have been to other people's churches but I miss mine. Badly. Enough unentertaining babbling.

Here is some spring - pollen and all!

I still have yet to get to Easter photos. Sorry.

I ♥ Faces - Self Portrait

2009-04-20T06:31:00.000-05:00

A Self Portrait

I like to play around with my photos lately, mostly just playing and trying to work them to cover imperfections. That just wont do with a self portrait.

You see that line in between my eyes? That line - I earned it because I scrunch my forehead when I think. I have this red spot on my left cheek that my dermatologist said she could zap away for me in 7 easy treatments (ha!) but you see, I got that pushing in my first labor.

All those imperfections make me perfect to the ones who love me. Those lines are who I am and they help illustrate my continuing story. I hope if you are joining in this week, and I hope you are, that you revel in your "imperfections" and bask in your "spots". Cheers!

My children's entry: My little girl & her favorite girl

I love Ella's squished face in this. Could she shut her eyes any tighter?
(This was in August before she decided her hair weighed too much)

Go check out more!
http://www.iheartfaces.blogspot.com/

I Went Manual

2009-04-15T14:36:00.004-05:00

I went totally Manual on my camera (Canon PowerShot S3 IS) this weekend and here are some photos straight out of the camera - not even cropped which I will definately do later. I am pretty excited. I had a BEAUTIFUL little baby to shoot (meet my niece Addison Jane!) so I was also elated for that. She looks like a little porcalin doll. Laura, she couldn't be better if you bathed her in sweet tea.

This is one step closer to feeling justified in buying a DSLR! Addison and I will be doing a little photo shoot this weekend. Any tips would be appreciated!

I ♥ Faces Amateur - Easter

2009-04-14T08:25:00.003-05:00

It is amateur week over at I ♥ Faces so go over and join in or take a look to get some ideas and leave encouraging comments! You know us bloggers like comments. *Cough*

This little bunny of mine was scoping out goodies down at the riverfront on Easter morning. So many photos from that day. They will come soon I promise!

What Happens While Standing in Line to Pee

2009-04-08T16:10:00.003-05:00

There is a reason I call myself "the Muddled". My brain is generally going in 2000 directions. This is no exception.

A kid in my preschool class said out of the blue with no prompting that he cant wait to get to heaven so he can get back all the balloons he lost in the air.
I should check how I use the word "inexpensive". It is quite relative.
Happy Passover! No I am not Jewish but passover reminds me of Jew food. I like Jew food.
I am looking for props to use while photographing my niece this weekend. I need bigger baskets. By "need" I mean "wish I had one handy" not actually need.
I should check my use of the word "need". 99.99% of the time it just means "want" or "golly gee it would be convenient to have right this second".
I have 3 ingredients I have recently started adding to different foods for fun. Lemongrass puree, Dijon Mustard & a third I would have to kill you if I told you. Just kidding.... No, I wasn't.
Ella got into this charter school via lottery that I didn't expect her to. I allowed myself to be excited about it. Then the principal called and said "We have to redraw so she isn't really in. Just kidding. No I wasn't."They redraw the lottery at 1:30 tomorrow. I am not sure of the probability of getting drawn again as I was blindsided and didn't ask how many other kids applied.
I miss my sandals.
I am so happy the Tar Heels won. Besides awesome reasons like "WERE NUMBER ONE!" it means Alex will get a nice overtime check.
I have seen two little boys whip it out and go pee right where they stood in the last 3 days. I really wish when I was pregnant with my kids that I would have been equipped with that power. I think that is one reason men dominate the world. Men took over while women were standing in line to pee.

So what about you? Any thoughts?

Ponce de Leon Lighthouse Florida

2009-04-06T15:02:00.003-05:00

We took a couple fun detours last weekend on our trip to Florida. We were drawn to this lighthouse like moths to a flame. It was so beautiful we spotted it's beautiful red silhouette from quite far away. This is the Ponce de Leon Lighthouse and it is a lovely stop on a road trip.

NC locals (or not!): We have LOTS of light stations in NC. Go check them out!

This last photo makes my imagination start going. I start imagining all these terrible romantic mysteries and forbidden love etc. I am so weird.

St. Augustine Beach, Florida

2009-04-04T07:54:00.000-05:00

We had a very nice day at the beach the day we had free to explore. We ended up at St. Augustine Beach. The sand was a little pinkish, the water was cool, the air warm and the kids happy. Nate explored the rocks a lot and Ella had a ball jumping and swimming in the waves and I took lots of photos. Of course. The sky was so beautiful that day with rain clouds rolling in so I have a lot of sky pics for you. Enjoy!

I ♥ Faces - Fix It Friday

2009-04-03T08:28:00.009-05:00

Fix it Friday was a fun one today. I just tried to make it something fun and young I thought she might like. Go check out all the others and pick up some tips at I ♥ Faces!

I really did do a lot of fun stuff to this one. All very easy. Lets see....

In the free version of Picnik I.......

Adjusted the sharpness to make it less blurry (in advanced mode)
Messed with the contrast and exposure (in advanced mode)
Played with the saturation (in advanced mode)

then the special effects.....
I used "Focal Zoom" and used the "Darken" under the advanced mode button (I just discovered that under the advanced mode in the focal zoom are like 7 more effects you can apply)
Then to get the light off the pom pom I used "Circle Splash", softened it and made the radius smaller to make it more subtle

If there is an "Advanced Mode" button to select - Use it!! It invariably makes it better when you play around with it to get the level of effect you want.
Made a frame, added text and there she is!

Here is the original...

Sex Just Changes When You Have Kids

2009-04-02T20:08:00.004-05:00

This might just fall into the category of TMI but it is pretty funny. Pretty darn funny.

So Alex has two jobs right now okay. Well, today he had an unusual break between jobs for a few hours so we ummm well.... see the kids were down for naps. Sort of. Nate was passed out but Ella was not actually sleeping per her usual pattern now.

So Alex and I decided to have a little nap time fun on his break if you know what I mean right (cue Barry White). We moved from the living room to the bedroom because I warned him that Ella was still awake. We proceeded to the bedroom, closed the door and - well - you know - proceeded some more. Without going into details we were both enjoying ourselves a lot when all of a sudden Alex sort of does this awkward swan dive onto the bed and I am left thinking WHY DID YOU STOP????!!!!!!

I look around expecting to see Ella at the door. Nope. Door secured. She was in the room!! No, not her room. OUR room. ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE BED. Yes, just let that sink in for a second. In her pink princess gown hiding on the other side of the bed. While we were doing our best baw chicka waw waw. Well, not our best but you know.

Alex calmly and slowly says "Ella, what are you doing?" and I am thinking good grief don't ask THAT. She might turn that one around. She just looks with her big old eyeballs like don't yell at me for being up at nap time as I attempt to suppress the embarrassed laughter. SHE WAS THERE THE WHOLE TIME!!! We were a good 3-4 minutes into it before he saw her and took the dive. I mean that is a good 5-10 years in therapy right there isn't it?

It took a second for us to figure out the next move. I just said "Umm okay Ella, go back to your room now" while I buried my face in the comforter laughing. What I really wanted to say was "Hit that Memory Repression Button now baby! Daddy was just tickling mommy!!" Then the laughter began. Laughing during and after sex is generally not a good idea -fragile male egos and all. There is an exception when your almost five year old daughter has just witnessed a particularly comical and playful precursor to sex as well as the getting down to business. Then I believe the only thing you can do is laugh. Hysterically while wondering what in the world she is thinking. OH MY GOODNESS!!

It is one thing to walk in on your parents having sex, it is another entirely to see your mom hang her bra on, umm well, not a coat rack.

Can't wait to see where and how this comes back to me. Oh my. Sex is so very different post kids.

Their Eyeballs Will Roll Out Any Second Now.....

2009-04-02T09:36:00.005-05:00

My kids have a fear that I apparently do not understand. You see, evidently they think that if they look directly at MY camera their eyeballs might roll out onto the ground and be scooped up by the dog like runaway meatballs. If someone else is behind the camera this does not seem to be an issue. With me they can prevent this three ways;

Avoiding eye contact with the lens all together. This is the favorite way and most effective. If the camera is out this will happen 99.999999% of the time.
Making a weird face that would convince any observer of a DNA issue that has gone undetected. This is my daughter's favorite go to. I think her father coached her. He does this too.
Looking at the camera and smiling but looking away JUST before the shutter opens. This is the most frustrating of all methods. It teases me just enough to get excited but then the let down is massive.
I anticipate the "Mom you suck" look to be added to the repertoire all too soon.

When I get pictures where they look at the camera AND smile I all but die. Really. Getting both of them to do it at the same time and I think suppressing the excitement so they don't know takes about 2 weeks off my life span.

Monkeys.

Thank you Rachel for the touch up for Ella's photo!

Savannah Georgia's Forsyth Park

2009-03-31T17:38:00.003-05:00

If you get the chance to visit Savannah Georgia a must see is Forsyth Park in the historic district. What a great place to let the kids run around and play. It is like a smaller southern version of Central Park. It comes complete with fountain, playground, tennis courts, charming oaks, Spanish moss and charm galore.

Did you notice the miracle? My kids are both looking at the camera.

At. the. same. time...

More road trip photos to follow of course.
Also, go to Savannah.

Florida or Bust!

2009-03-27T09:02:00.006-05:00

I am off to Florida kids! I won't lie and say I am not excited. I will try to take lots of photos while I am outside. Wish my little sister Grace good luck with her meet!

I plan on doing some loud bad singing in the car, trying NOT to come back with a trucker tan OR a sunburn, getting some good chat time in with my mom, rescuing my kids from some waves and screaming my head off for my sister. I also hope to have a funny story or two to post for you when I get back.

Things I love about Florida:
Warm Sand
~~Gigantic Life Purging Mosquitos~~
Warm Beaches
Proximity to real Cuban food
My college roomie Jen
Palm Trees
~~Confronting my fear of little old ladies~~
Surrounded on 3 sides by Ocean
Warm Beaches
Palm Trees

Must pack now.

Miss me!